Why is submission so hard?

Hey!!!
I know family, a few of you may have tried the whole "give him something" idea and maybe it hurt your soul to do it.

Why does it hurt so bad to trust them with something simple? Cause we are afraid it won't be done "right". But why do we feel that we know what "right" is? Cause we want to be the one who knows. Granted,  this happens to men as well. This is not a sex divided topic. Some men have the same kind of issues, but in their case it's usually called "control". That's why becoming submitted is so difficult at times for women. I'll tackle "control" as another blog topic.

So we asked why is it so hard. Let's go back to the beginning. Waaaaaay in the beginning. Let's go to 

Genesis 2:8-9 and 15-17

8Then the lord God planted a garden in Eden in the east, and there he placed the man he had made. 9The lord God made all sorts of trees grow up from the ground—trees that were beautiful and that produced delicious fruit. In the middle of the garden he placed the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

15The lord God placed the man in the Garden of Eden to tend and watch over it. 16But the lord God warned him, “You may freely eat the fruit of every tree in the garden—17except the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. If you eat its fruit, you are sure to die.”

So here we see here that man got some clear concise direction from God. It was very easy. This is your land. I need for you to care for it. God assigned this to Him. He gave Adam another clear instruction. Eat whatever you want in the garden except for the fruit from THIS tree. Simple. Nice and simple. Easy? I'd like to think so. Take care of what I gave you and eat whatever fruit you want, but DONT eat the fruit from this particular tree . 

Now after this, God created woman. It was in verse 18 that it is said that God Said that it wasn't right for man to be alone and He Will create a HELPER for him. Not a challenger. Not a boss. But a HELPER. This title also does NOT mean that Man's helper is to be run over either. God called this person that He was to create a HELPER not a SLAVE. 

It was in Genesis 3 that our issues actually start. Lets go to chapter 3:1-3;

1The serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the lord God had made. One day he asked the woman, “Did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden?”

2“Of course we may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,” the woman replied. 3“It’s only the fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden that we are not allowed to eat. God said, ‘You must not eat it or even touch it; if you do, you will die.’”

I have such huge issues with this part. So problem number 1. I want to just fuss out Eve because this is the beginning of Woman and Men's demise. My question was why are you talking to a serpent? But then I have to remember that they don't know anything about evil yet. They don't know that "bad" is in the world. And God never told them to stay away from serpents because He created them very shrewd. So ok, i'll let that pass. That's just me.

But Eve let that serpent get in her head when he started questioning "Did God really say this?" And although I searched all through Genesis 2 and 3 I didn't find where God repeated the instruction about the fruit to Eve directly, but she knew it. Which tells me either God did tell her or she was told by Adam, her "head". And her being submitted as his helper, she believes in his instruction that he received from God. Great! She is in her place. But then this happens....

4“You won’t die!” the serpent replied to the woman. 5“God knows that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it, and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil.”

6The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too.

So first off, Eve allowed someone talk to her and question God's words. When she quoted back what God said that should have been the end of the discussion. But, because if she was submitted, she would have remembered, that she believed what God told her husband. And knowing that Adam was told by God, yea that should have settled it. There was no argument from there. But she didn't shut the serpent up or walk away. She allowed the serpent to continue to speak to her and convinced her that she would be like God if she ate of the fruit. And having Wisdom sounded really wonderful to her.

How many of us really just talk to too many people and suddenly find ourselves convinced of something different than the facts that we know and originally believed? We believe there is an ulterior motive. Which yes, sometimes there are. But things are meant for God's time. We say in His time, and EVERYTHING will work well for us. Don't believe it? Lets analyze this further. 

So Eve was convinced by the serpent and ate of the fruit. Then she gave some to her loving husband WHO WAS WITH HER. Problem number 2. How could she be submitted if Adam wasn't? How do I know that he wasn't? Because we know that HE was the one who got the instruction from God's own mouth. And he is the head. I know he is the head because Eve was created as his HELPER. AND Adam was WITH HER when she ate the fruit and she gave some to him and he just ate it. It does not say that he resisted when she offered it to him. And it does not say that she, being his helper, was pulled away by Adam before she ate it. So a few mistakes right here. Eve let someone in her head, which distracted her from complete obedience. When that happened, Adam was distracted by Eve's disobedience (which probably looked so good to him at that time) and that left him in disobedience against God and His instruction.

Don't quite understand it? Ok, lets break it to what we do understand. Imagine this. A dad tells his 2 kids eat whatever snacks you want, but do NOT touch the chocolate. It doesn't matter WHY he said don't eat the chocolate. What matters is that he is the Leader of the family and he gave a rule. Eventually the younger of the kids goes and eats a piece of chocolate. Standing beside that child is the older child who instead of saying "don't eat that! Daddy said no!" he just watches and when the first child hands them the other part of the piece of chocolate saying "Its so good! No wonder he didn't want us to eat it!" and that child eats it too. Now, daddy holds both of them responsible for not being obedient. But, as the leader of the siblings, the older is likely more heavily accountable because they are responsible for those beneath him. The older should have stopped the younger child in his disobedience to his father, rather than just joining in.

Like the father, God may have just wanted to hold off on the fruit from the tree of life for a later time. Adam and Eve may have needed to go through a process first before receiving the wisdom that was in the fruit of the tree. We may never know. The father may have told his kids not to eat the chocolate because he was holding it for a special reward for them for doing all their chores this week. You never know.

Sometimes our husband may say I need you to do this. And because we as women are not told "Why", sometimes we end up putting ourselves in a position where we end up creating assumptions for the answers we don't have. When really the answer is that he asked us to do something, we should just go ahead and honor him. Now remember, i'm not talking about a controlling spouse. I'll get to those in another topic, i'm talking about the normal husband that might even just be a little lost.

Help these men become leaders ladies. Fight a little less. Ask why a little less. Somethings are just because you love your man and want to honor his wish and make him smile. So if you are questioning your Submission, the first thing you need to do is look at is your general obedience. Are you obedience in your normal life outside of the house? Then if you find that you are normally obedient outside of the home, you can ask yourself "Am I obedient inside the home too?"

If you find that your answer to the last one was "Maybe not so much", don't worry, you aren't alone. Many of US are still working on it. If you want something to guide you as an example of a submitted wife, check out Proverbs 31. That woman is an awesome woman.

I love you all, be blessed!!!